Hello everyone! My name is Jan and welcome back to another blog post ◝(ᵔᵕᵔ)◜ ♥
Lately since February to now, I’ve been reading like crazy. I’ve been reading books after books, binging Marvel films after Marvel films, K-drama after K-drama (who’s been watching Penthouse and Love Alarm??) and my thoughts have been just been jumbled together with everything I’ve watched/read that I must discuss with you all. But first, since I’ve been behind on my book reviews, let’s start with that 😀
If you follow me on Twitter, you’re probably aware of how badly I’ve been wanting to read The Ones We’re Meant to Find by Joan He. Ever since I read the synopsis and the book cover got revealed on Twitter, I’ve been obsessed. I needed the book so desperately in my hands and I needed it ASAP. And finally after many months of waiting… I finally recieved the ARC! After reading Victoria @ corneliastreetreadsblog post about TOWMTF… I couldn’t be more excited to read it.
Without further ado, let’s get started with my review! ❤
Cee awoke on an abandoned island three years ago. With no idea of how she was marooned, she only has a rickety house, an old android, and a single memory: she has a sister, and Cee needs to find her.
STEM prodigy Kasey wants escape from the science and home she once trusted. The eco-city—Earth’s last unpolluted place—is meant to be sanctuary for those commited to planetary protection, but it’s populated by people willing to do anything for refuge, even lie. Now, she’ll have to decide if she’s ready to use science to help humanity, even though it failed the people who mattered most.
WeWere Liarsmeets Black Mirror in this twisting tale of two sisters, one who woke up on an abandoned island with no memory except of her sister and the other a STEM prodigy living in this dystopian Earth where every inch of life is dying due to pollution and the inevitable dangers of climate change.
I’ve read a handful of books so far in 2021, and I’m sure most of you are aware how I dislike every fictional main character ever no matter who it is because… they always have some way to annoy me.
But surprisingly, I can say that I really enjoyed all the characters in TOWMTF!!! Even I’m surprised that I liked every single character in this book! They were all interesting, complex, and I was really invested in the relationship between Cee and her sister Kasey. Immediately after reading the synopsis, I was hooked.
You get see life from two different points of view. One from Cee on her abandoned island, and one from Kasey on her dying skydome. Cee on her journey of trying to find her way back to her sister and Kasey trying to save human existence.
To those who have read TOWMTF have been discoursing over which sister they like better, whether it be Cee or Kasey. Even though Kasey is a fellow STEM student like myself, I would have to say I prefer Cee. I think that her storyline and plot throughout the book made me more interested and invested than Kasey’s did. Her determination to get off this island and find her sister tugged on my heart strings because even though Cee has no recollection of her life before, she only remembered and knew one thing. She had to find her sister. At all costs.
Kasey was more closed off and reserved. I found it hard to find her likeable because of how gray her character was. But I do admire how she set she was on trying to make the best of her skydome life. I did enjoy seeing both different points of view, one life on in island, the other life in a modern world away from a polluted earth.
I really liked the STEM side of this book as well! As a person in STEM myself, it was really interesting to see Kasey’s side of things and hard she worked for to make life livable.
At first, the synopsis of this book made me think of it as Lost meets The Giver because of its scientific environment but after reading, I can definitely see where the We Were Liars and Black Mirror aspect comes from. This book definitely rubbed me in the Black Mirror part. You have these kind of expectations and predictions for what’s going to happen until the technological side weaves in and changes everything.
Joan has a way of building up scenes and emotions that leaves me absolutely shook. The twists and turns are something that I don’t expect at all and I am still trying to process what tf happened! You don’t see these twists coming at all and that’s what I loved the most about this ARC.
I loved every aspect of TOWMTF. From being on an abandoned island, mysterious allies and brooding side characters, the scientific side of trying to save life and human existence- it just had me hooked from beginning to end. I didn’t know what to expect at all and Joan He really did that.
If you are planning to read this book or is currently reading it now, all I can say is that you are going to be completely shook reading The Ones We’re Meant to Find.
That’s all for today’s post! Thank you for stopping by, it really means a lot.
Hi there! My name is Jan and welcome back to another blog post ◝(ᵔᵕᵔ)◜ ♥
This is my first wrap up on my blog and I’m vv excited to do it! Usually I write down everything I’ve loved/did in a month down in my journal just bc it’s a good way to spill out my feelings and reflect, but after seeing so many other bloggers do wrap ups on their blog, I decided to give it a shot! I want to connect and interact with you guys as much as possible ❤
I will be talking about everything I’ve read, watched, listened and more! To watch my february wrap up video, watch it here! ❤
February was a really, really, busy and hectic month for me. It was also really chaotic in terms of my personal life, my school life, and my life as a content creator. Even though I was really busy and overwhelmed, I still had a lot of good moments I would like talk about with you all! How was February for you? Anything exciting happen? Let me know!
In total I’ve read about 4 books last month, which isn’t a lot but I’m proud of myself for reading consistently lately! Once I’m in a slump, I get into a SLUMP, so I’m really proud of myself being able to do so!
What I’ve read in February:
I finally read The Burning God after setting it aside for months! Thank you Ace and Trin for bullying me into finishing it ❤ Check out my review here!
I also read The Invisible Life of Addie Larue after seeing it float around TikTok for so long. My irl friends sent it to me knowing how much I like books and thought I would enjoy it… well… I didn’t LMFAO. The ending is what saved it for me but it was really boring in my opinion 😦 I should be posting a book review of this soon! Be sure to watch out for that ❤
I Love You So Mochi has been on my TBR for so long and I finally read it this month! It definitely got me into the February feels just because of how cute and fluffy it was. Definitely a great and light read if you want some cute fluff ❤
I also read Horimiya Vol.9 ! I always try to read at least one manga a month and I’ve been binging the Horimiya series ever since the anime got released this year! It’s definitely one of my favorite mangas ever, it’s so fluffy and wholesome and cute and I WOULD JUST D WORD FOR IZUMI MIYAMURA. thank you.
I mean, seriously, look how cute they are :((
I also got approved for one of the ARCs I’ve been wanting to read FOREVER!! The Ones We’re Meant to Find by Joan He has been at the top of my most anticipated 2021 reads and I’m sososo happy I finally have it in my possessions to read ❤ I’m only at the 50% mark and things are getting CRAZY. I can’t wait to share my thoughts with you all later on the blog!
I’ve also binged a ton of stuff this month! I finally watched Always and Forever, Lara Jean with my best friend before Valentine’s day (reaction video is coming soon I promith), and I’ve also been binging a lot of Marvel movies lately after finally getting Disney+ LOL.
I finally!! started!!! watching!! WandaVision!!! If you read my Most Anticiated Books and Films of 2021, you should already know that I’ve been waiting for this series FOREVERRR!! I’m a huge Marvel stan and I’ve missed their movies sooo much (my favorite Avengers are Wanda, Captain America & Spider-Man) and duuuude when I say this series is good, IT IS SO GOOD!!! I never know what to expect every episode and I’m always left with a feeling of confusion BC I JUST WANT TO KNOW WHAT HAPPENS NEXT!!! I love Wanda so much, she’s grown so much since Age of Ultron I’m just :((( I JUST WANT HER TO BE HAPPY!!!
Oh and I finished True Beauty also, and I’m just devastated I just want Han Seojun to be happy 😦
So. I was really, really, busy, this month! And I still am really busy! The grind just doesn’t stop forrealll.
This month I had to apply to my school’s Radiography program, which is essentially the school for people who major in X-Ray Technology. In order for me to finish the rest of my classes and graduate, I have to apply to the program! It was a very hectic week for me but I’m so glad that I got it done !
I also reconnected with my friends that I haven’t talked to in a while ! 2020 was the year where I fell off with a lot of my close friends and lost some really valauble friendships which made me rlly sad for a while, but this year I started to reconnect with my old pals that had a rlly big impact on my life and I’m glad I started talking to them again ❤
I had a galentine’s day with my best friend shan! usually on a holiday we have a special day together where we have this sort of (potluck?) together and watch a movie? we always try to go for “aesthetic” foods to post on instagram and whatnot but it always fails LMAO. for galentine’s day we had shumai, mac n cheese, carne asada fries, and fried chicken along with coca-cola. we spent the rest of the night watching always and forever, lara jean and making really bad music videos LOL.
Doing these writing sprints have made me so productive with my writing and I’m vv glad I started doing them with my lovely group of friends, I honestly love them so much ❤ Honestly, I write a lot when I do write and I can write about 400-600 words in twenty minutes and I do enjoy writing a lot but I’m just… too… lazy… to write… LOL
I’ve been doing nightly writing sprints with Trin though and it’s boosted my productivity by a lot lmao TY TRIN!
I also finished my first anthology submission! Ace and I both wrote short stories for this Queer Yonder Anthology and we had a such a fun time writing it! This anthology submission I wrote was based off of my friend’s dream and it’s a horror/inception kind of story and it’s the second story I’ve ever written that I actually finished! Even though I didn’t get chosen, I’m really proud of myself for finishing this story that I put my all into. I’m also wanna say thank you to my soulmate Ren for helping me out on this submission!! I’m so sorry that you had to bear and edit it with me SFKASJFKASJK. I love you bae.
Here’s a smol collage of my month down below ❤
One last thing that I want to mention what happened in February is that I celebrated my ult bias’s birthday LOL. HAPPY BIRTHDAY I LURV UUU. (I also celebrated 4 years of stanning him :D) My fav thai idol ❤
Mentally, i’ve been okay. i’ve had a few moments last month when i was truly going thru it but recently i’ve been journaling my thoughts/things im grateful for/my day every night in my journal and it’s been really helpful taking some weight off my shoulders. after reconnecting with some things/people that have hurt me in the past last month, it was rlly hard to come to terms with how i felt about those certain things/people and your girl was just going thru it. but i’ve been bearing my feelings day by day. being surrounded by my wonderful book friends have helped me a lot and i’m really proud of myself for growing from the person i used to be a year ago.
My self-confidence has also been boosted up a lot bc of my amazing friends that I around me! I’ve been feeling vv pretty lately ❤ (sorry to be narcissistic but after feeling hideous for a good month this has been very uplifting on my heart LOL)
That’s all for today’s post! Thank you so much for stopping, it truly means a lot ❤
Disclaimer: This book is not for everyone. This entire series in fact is not for everyone. It touches on very sensitive topics + is very graphic. Some of the trigger warnings include: war, racism, genocide, mass rape, sexual assault, torture, cannibalism, etc. Here is the full list of trigger warnings.
Title: The Burning God (The Poppy War #3)
Author: R.F Kuang
Publication Date: November 17, 2020
Let’s get started.
After saving her nation of Nikan from foreign invaders and battling the evil Empress Su Daji in a brutal civil war, Fang Runin was betrayed by allies and left for dead.
Despite her losses, Rin hasn’t given up on those for whom she has sacrificed so much—the people of the southern provinces and especially Tikany, the village that is her home. Returning to her roots, Rin meets difficult challenges—and unexpected opportunities. While her new allies in the Southern Coalition leadership are sly and untrustworthy, Rin quickly realizes that the real power in Nikan lies with the millions of common people who thirst for vengeance and revere her as a goddess of salvation.
Backed by the masses and her Southern Army, Rin will use every weapon to defeat the Dragon Republic, the colonizing Hesperians, and all who threaten the shamanic arts and their practitioners. As her power and influence grows, though, will she be strong enough to resist the Phoenix’s intoxicating voice urging her to burn the world and everything in it?
Cue the fires.
I finally got the opprotunity to purchase final installment of The Poppy War series two months after the release date aaaand wow.
That was something.
I’ve been holding off on finishing the last book of the amazing series merely because I was too scared of finishing it and I simply didn’t want it to end. Though I am late on the train and finished this book months after everyone else finished it, I surprisingly didn’t see any spoilers.
It honestly took me forever to finish this book even though I purchased this in January and it took two of my friends to bully me into finishing it and after much anticipation and many days of bullying… I did.
The only thing I can say is: why did I put this down in the first place?
If you follow me on Twitter, you were probably already aware of my Burning God thread that I started in January and abandoned until a few days ago when I finished it. And that thread is just me being in full and utter disbelief and shock because of what on Earth was going on in that book.
Within each page I turned, it just became more and more intense. More and more heavy and more and more… mind f*cking.
Reading this book was certainly a wild ride. There were so many moments where I had to put it down simply because it was getting too much.
I loved this book and I also hated it at the same time. Much like how I loved/hated the first two. Kuang has such a way of making me want to strangle her characters physically through the pages that it was driving me insane.
I didn’t have any theories whatsoever before I dove into this book, all I know/wanted was for Rin to take Nezha down.
Before I dive deep into my review about this book, all I can say for those who haven’t read the last and gut-wrenching conclusion to The Poppy War is that it is not what you expect at all. Multiple things happen in this book that had me on the edge of my seat and I simply had to put it down because it was either getting too much or because I was too scared to finish it.
(major spoilers ahead)
Slowly throughout the book, we see Rin become… well… insane.
She became basically insane.
What I liked most about this book was that Rebecca didn’t sugarcoat anything when it came to the topic of war. This book is as brutal and violent and it really jerks you to see the real reality and devastation that happens to people when a war occurs.
What I really like about this series is how Rebecca played with time (as wars do take over several years). We literally meet Rin when she’s only like 13 and throughout the time span of when she turns 20, we see her become a shaman, a war criminal, and a mfing murderer. She literally burned a dude’s testicles off at like 18!!! What?!
Even though this series takes course over several years, the books don’t feel too rushed or too long and yet we still feel/see the growth of the characters.
Throughout the last book, we see Rin take control and become a leader and also lose her way within these pages. Rin has seen/been through unspeakable things that it didn’t really surprise me one bit to see her lose her mind and and change into someone we don’t even recognize due to what she’s experienced. She sort of became… demonized.
She’s seen too much, fought too much, seen her own comrades die in this war and betray her. We literally see her at her breaking point where the phoenix basically consumes Rin and all she sees is red.
Vengeance becomes the only thing that strives her to keep fighting in this war. The only thing she has going throughout this book is defeating Nezha and the southern coalition.
The amount of people that betrayed Rin in this book just left me shocked like man! No one likes her!!!
I also want to bring up this really intense scene that I just can’t stop thinking about. It literally lives in my head rent free. It’s the scene when Rin goes back to Tikany after the Hessians are there and they’re celebrating their departure and Rin is with Souji right when the bombs go off and she realizes that Nezha has been following her this entire time.
That scene when Rin is fighting Nezha and she sees that the Dragon god in him is much more powerful than she thought. Nezha and his ability to control the water was at a whole entire different level. Not only could he control the water but he could manipulate it to his will. The scene was so intense because it was raining hard, hard and as much as Rin tried to use her fire abilities, Nezha just kept putting it out by summoning more and more rain. It was honestly so intense that it kept me on the edge of my seat because I have been anticipating the moment when Rin and Nezha were going to meet up after Nezha’s betrayal in The Dragon Republic. To be honest I don’t really know who I was rooting for because I knew that both Nezha and Rin were both powerful as fuck and it kept reminding me of when Katara and Zuko went to fight Azula during the last episode of Avatar: The Last Airbender.And it also reminded me of that one meme where Squirtle was fighting Pikachu (even though Pikachu conducts lightningksjfks).
HONESTLY, TELL ME IT DOESN’T REMIND YOU OF THAT TOO.
(*side note when I found out Hanelei was Altan and Rin’s relative?? They’re cousins??? HUHHH)
INCEST!!! WHY INCEST???? I WOULD’VE CONTINUED ENJOYING THE BOOK IF REBECCA DIDN’T HAVE TO INCLUDE THE INCEST!!
The final book is much more darker than the first two. It has a much more realist undertone that the other two books didn’t have. While we were still centered around the story of war and destruction between two countries, there were still some light-hearted moments that made me laugh and smile and that was the relationship that Rin had with her comrades. Her anchor Kitay and the Cike. I found their adventures together and their banter to be funny and heart-warming. Chaghan and Rin’s back and forth was what honestly made me love The Dragon Republic and The Poppy War. The fact that this final book was more dark, more realistic made it have much more of an impact on me that I literally won’t ever forget. Even though the ending was certainly not what I was expecting, I know Rebecca wanted to portray realistic events of what actually happens in a war and that’s what made this book much more darker and deeper than the first two.
It is brutal and it is honest. Towards the end when Rin becomes so distrusting of everyone and her comrades until she thinks everyone’s just praying on her downfall is what made me so angry and so anxious for what was going to happen because I was getting closer and closer to the end and Rin was just becoming insane.
Finally, the ending… was not what I expected at all. It left me completely and honestly… broken.
Oh no! Jan becoming destroyed by another book? Are we surprised?
What do you do when you run over a Cupid? Do you call State Farm insurance? Sing, “like a good neighbor state farm is there?” Well, in Playing Cupid, when you run over the mystical being, you get to be cupid instead. And if you suck at the topic that is love just like our main character MeganCooper– well, all I can say is good luck, Charlie.
Title: Playing Cupid
Author: SC Alban
Publication Date: February 23, 2021
For the past five years, seventeen-year-old Megan Cooper has built a wall around her heart with little room to experience true feelings. However, her entire world shifts the moment she hits Cupid with her car driving home from finals. With his shooting arm significanting injured, she has no choice but to take his place.
Now, as Megan races to find Cupid’s final three love matches in order to meet his quota by the start of the new year, she comes face to face with the very emotions she’s been pushing away for so long.
Caught between what her head is saying and what her heart longs for, Megan must face old wounds, find forgiveness, and track down the perfect match for the one boy she can’t stand.
Thank you NetGalley for sending me a copy in exchange for an honest review!
Playing Cupidfollows seventeen-year-old Megan Cooper, a recluse in her senior year of high school before graduating early and going to college for early admission. She has a sort of rocky relationship with her dad and basically people in general. Following the death of her mother, her relationship with her father ceased to exist to the point where he can’t even face her anymore because she reminded him so much of his first love. During finals week, Megan is paired up with her school’s hottest jock, Jay Michaels, although nice, polite to teachers and massively attractive, he flakes out of every school assignment ever.
After driving home from her Home EC final, Megan is angered with the audacity that Jay Michaels have, flaking out on herwhen all she wants to do is get her last assignment done with so that she can be done with high school. Driving at a horribly fast rate, Megan runs over an unseen figure in the road– that figure turning out to be the love god himself Cupid.
Now with the task to do Cupid’s job for him since his shooting arm is broken, can Megan find love for other people, including herself?
This book was an easy light-hearted, humourous and very heartwarming read. After reading this book, I was left with a nice feeling in my chest and I definitely felt the loving mood that it gave me. It finally felt like was February 💖 .
However, even though I do love good fluff and cute romantic tropes in books, Playing Cupid was a solid 2/5 stars for me.
The plot itself was okay. It was simple, really. Ran over Cupid? He can’t do his job of making people fall in love? No problem! Megan Cooper is right here, and she’ll get the job done! I thought that the idea of the plot was interesting and cute, we even got to see the Cupid (Amadeo) and Megan form a kind of relationship together which I found really sweet and wholesome. But, alas, this book just added another character onto my “mcs that I can’t stand” list.
Mainly why this book fell flat for me was because of the main character Megan. For some reason I just couldn’t connect with her throughout the entirety of this book. Her personality just didn’t click with me, and I found myself cringing and rolling my eyes at almost everything that she was thinking/saying/doing.
What irritated me the most was her “I’m not like other girls” personality. I’m okay with the trope/characteristic, but the fact that the book brought up that she wasn’t like other girls all the time is what annoyed me the most. The fact that there was written dialogue by her and the main love interest saying that she wasn’t like other girls made my fingers physically curl up because of how much I cringed.
The only character that I felt that I genuinely liked was Amadeo. The Cupid Megan ran over. His character was witty, sarcastic and downright entertaining. He was the only one that got me to continue the book.
Overall, I found Amadeo and Megan’s adventure of trying to find matches all over town to be entertaining and very fluffy! It’s definitely a read for February to get in the loving mood.
I hope everyone is well! Thank you for coming by ❤
Hi there! My name is Jan and welcome back to another blog post ◝(ᵔᵕᵔ)◜ ♥
If you didn’t know I really love films. Like really love films. If I’m not crying or complaining over the latest book I’ve read, I will most likely be found crying or complaining about my latest anime binges and tv shows.
Since this blog is still “somewhat” new I’ve figured what another way of getting to know me is by discussing my absolute favorite animes. Of course there a lot to list out so I’ll just be doing my top eight!
What genres are your favorite?
I don’t know what’s wrong with me but my favorite animes would usually consist of shoujo/slice of life/sad animes. For some reason I really like being sad and having my heart torn into pieces.
My favorite genres include romance, slice of life, action, drama/tragedy and comedies! Those are just my favorite types of animes to watch. If the main character doesn’t make me feel sumn, I don’t want it.
Most of my favorites that I’m about to list out are either a slice of life, or really, really sad (I’m sorry in advance) but I just love dramatic, sad, depiction of life stories because they make me think differently about life also while being able to tear my heart to absolute smithereens and I live for that sh*t.
Without further ado, let’s get started!
Your Lie in April (2015)
This is the first anime that’s ever made me sob, sob. A young prodigy grieving after his mother’s death, meets a free-spirited violinist. Through their friendship, he learns to see the world through music once again.
I first watched this anime back in 2018 when a really good friend of mine recommended it to me and man, did I cry at the end. Not only was the story amazing and aesthetically pleasing to watch, but the music and soundtrack is what made this anime so much more appealing and heart-warming. To watch these two musicians with complete opposite personalities form a friendship and work through their each of their own trauma absolutely tore my heart into pieces. I absolutely loved it so much.
Not only was the story and characters absolutely amazing, but cinematography was absolutely phenomenal. My favorite moments in the anime would be whenever they played music, whether it be by the piano or violin, you would see all this type of art surrounding the two main characters as they played, symbolizing how music made them feel, how music itself was like a type of soul within them and how they were the only two people right in that moment.
See how absolutely beautiful that is? They were both two complete strangers before meeting each other, and through music did they learn what the value of life was and how meaningful their playing actually meant to not only them, but to others as well.
The ending scene absolutely broke me. The way their last performance together was executed and the way it was a reflection of what was happening in their physical lives made me cry my eyes out. This anime is not only amazing but it is also beautiful. Please check it out if you love music included in stories.
To watch the trailer for Your Lie in April, click here.
Hotarubi no Mori e(2011)
I think this was the first anime movie I watched last year back when quarantine was just beginning to start. I remember hearing a lot about this anime but could never find the time to watch it, so after one of my many late night group facetime calls with my friends, I promised them I would be back after watching the anime and came back to the call an hour later sobbing my eyes out.
Did this anime absolutely destroy me? Yes. Do I recommend everyone to watch this? Also yes.
Childhood friends-to-lovers have always been a trope that I hold near and dear to my heart, so not only did anime also do that trope justice, but the friends-to-lover progression between the two main characters was absolutely beautiful and magnificent to watch. Even though this movie was a very short to watch (45 mins) it felt like I was watching 2 hours worth of relationship building and love just because of good it was. The story is really heart-warming and tugs your heartstrings. The ending isn’t what you expect but it’s what makes this movie unforgettable. The characters were amazing, the story was phenomenal, you will need a tissue if you watch this.
10/10 stars for this one
To watch the trailer for Hotarubi no Mori e, click here.
A Silent Voice (2017)
Was this another anime that made me bawl my eyes out? Yes. Did I have any regrets at all after watching it? No.
I’ve actually watched this movie twice; the first time I didn’t cry because I wasn’t really paying attention to it and had many other things on my mind, the second time was just last year and I finally got the chance to digest and take in the whole story and characters, making an everlasting impression on me that I will never forget.
The story is so absolutely wonderful. From both main characters, we see a glimpse of their mental health and what they’re both going through. How they both have this struggle of being alive because of depression. The main message of a struggle of communication between the main character Ishida and Nishimiya really warmed my heart because of how much it reflected society, and how they are not a lot of people who are accommodating to people who are impaired and that just really hit my heart right from the start.
The character I connected the most with was Shoya Ishida, with anxiety was a constant presence in his life and how he always felt alone and how he had to prove to not only Nishimiya but himself also how he was a good person and how he had to try living.
This movie is an absolutely need to watch. If you haven’t watched A Silent Voice, please check it out.
To watch the trailer for A Silent Voice, click here.
This anime is really heavy on the struggle of carrying guilt and grieving over the death of a loved one. It’s such a wonderful and beautiful anime and clearly depicts the feelings of how one can look okay on the outside but not be so entirely okay on the inside.
The value of friendship and time is a clear message in this anime because of how much each character tries to make all the right choices when it comes to their new friend Naruse. I know there’s a lot of commotion around the subject of finding a significant other and being in a relationship, but I feel like friendship and being able to have your friend’s back is just as important as a romantic relationship. This anime helped me realize that every single person that you meet, whether it be for a second for ten years, they all leave a sort of impact in your life, no matter how small or big, they were a part of your life, and we shouldn’t take that for granted.
This anime really opens your eyes on how you should check up on your friends and family because no matter how okay we may seem on the outside, we don’t truly know everyone is actually feeling.
This anime kid of hit home because I found myself being able to relate to the main character and how she came to terms with her sickness, but what I loved the most about her was that she didn’t make her illness become her whole personality and how she always saw the bright side of things no matter what.
I also really love the badass/idontgiveaf*ck and himbo best friend trope with all my heart. The two characters really reminded me of myself and my best friend! Overall this story was very touching and not at all what you expect. You think that you know it’s going to turn out but then turns into something completely different. This movie overall was amazing and had me laughing every fifteen minutes or so.
9/10 stars for this one.
To watch the trailer for I Want to Eat Your Pancras, click here.
Weathering With You
I actually watched this movie in theatres at the very beginning of 2020 right before COVID-19 hit hard and the way I will never forget the way how badly I teared up towards the end of the movie. I’ll never forget that night and feeling ever again. It was my best friend’s 20th birthday, it was cold outside and our breaths always came out as icy particles whenever we exhaled and the mood was just immaculate.
If you’ve watched the very popular anime movie Your Name, then you’ll definitely enjoy this. You might even be surprised on who makes special appearances in this one.
To be able to actually watch this film in theatres was such amazing experience. Especially since I got to hear the amazing soundtrack by one of my favorite band The Radwimps so clearly from all the surrounding speakers.
You can kind of see where the story is going towards the end and how fate and destiny ultimately win in the end, even though I kind of predicted the ending, I will never forget scene during the very last act. There’s this line from the film that has been in my head ever since I watched it last year, and it’s “I don’t care if the world never sees sunshine again, I want you more than any blue sky.”
The line alone made the movie unforgettable. The story is beautiful and the relationship between all of the characters is just heart-warming and magnificent. Please watch Weathering With You. You will not be disappointed. I promise.
My Little Monster (2012)
Pause, right now. I know that the last six animes I’ve listed above have all been outright sad and tear-jerking, so finally, I present to you, dear reader, fluff.
Yes, I’m recommending My Little Monster, I feel like it’s a really nice and light-hearted school anime that makes you fall deeply in love with both of the main characters. If you like the focused/idontcareaboutanythingelse main protagonist and dumb himbo who’s in love with her kind of trope, then I say that this anime is perfect for you.
I watched this anime my freshman year of college and can I just say that I loved, loved, loved this anime sooooo much after I finished watching it. It’s an easy slice-of-life anime that you will never get bored of watching. It’s such a light-hearted anime about a love story between the studious girl and her trouble-maker classmate.
I know that this anime is quite relatively (?) new as it just came out at the beginning of the year, but this is one of the stories that I hold near and dear to my heart. I read the manga back in high school and I remember just loving it soooo much that I was absolutely geeked out when I found out the adapted anime would be coming out soon.
I find these two characters to be so amazing and I absolutely love them with all my heart. Izumi Miyamura who is this soft-spoken, quiet introvert that no one talks to having another side that only Hori knows about is just so??? fluffy??? to me??? Like you must like someone so much if you let them see a part of you that no one else knows about. Same goes for Hori, while she may look like popular and outspoken idol student on the outside, she really just is a homebody who remarkably resembles a housewife who really cares about her little brother.
I find their love story to be just absolutely adorable and cute. It’s the kind of high school love story I wish I had back then but I’m so glad I got to read this manga when I was still a student back then.
I wish I could say more about how fluffy this anime is, but I’m still waiting for more episodes to be released. I have absolutely no idea if this anime will make me cry or not. We’ll just have to wait and find out.
It’s your stereotypical high school anime with a shy emo boyfriend and outspoken preppy girlfriend. It’s my favorite anime of all time. Definitely check it out if you love fluff and romance.
Have you watched any of these? What are your thoughts on them? What are your favorite animes that I should check out? If you definitely like crying (lol) and coming out of a film feeling like your entire life has changed, you should check out these animes.
Also, you should listen to the Radwimps music while you’re at it. The soundtrack for Your Name and Weathering With You makes me ball my eyes out everytime I listen to it.
it was a dark winter night
my heart in tatters and in shreds
i could not see sunlight no matter how many times it peaked behind the clouds
my flowers were wilted and dead
then came sudden sunlight
piercing through the winter clouds
a star in a blighted sky
a fresh new spring had come out for a day
and i started to bloom.
If you follow me on Twitter you probably were already aware of me freaking out over this book because I had gotten almost a third of it in when I realized… it was horror….
Call the circus.
This book was amazing, weird, downright confusing up to the very last page and yet I still ate it up. I knew about this book from my very good friend Mari over @ macnbooks and I just thought it was going to be a dark academia/witchy/underground cult going on underneath Warren University until I got up to page 76 and realized that it was indeed not that.
This book had many WTF moments, many what is going on, and many oh my god my brain moments as I continued reading.
We follow our main character Samantha who is a graduate student at New England’s Elite Warren University and she has a passion for writing and yet doesn’t really write (like me??). She really only sticks to one person during her years of Graduate school and that is her very best friend Eva. At the beginning of the book they are at this gathering for the start of the school year and both Samantha and Eva see this cohort group of girls that call each other Bunnyand we see right away how weary they are of them.
The Bunnies’ small group is called The Smut Salon and while Ava is cringing and saying how weird the Bunnies’ are, Samantha catches their attention at the event, and waves at them.
The next day Samantha gets an invitation from the Bunnies to meet with them for the very first time at their famous Smut Salon and all hell breaks loose from there.
I don’t want to say too much and spoil the fun for other people (I’m also working on my own book talk video for my channel so look out for that) but after Samantha gets involved with the Bunnies at their very first meaning, some weird shit happens.
Like. Really. Weird. Shit.
Have you ever heard the burning of a tea kettle? And the whistling sound slowly getting higher and higher as it gets hotter and hotter? That was the same feeling I kept getting as the more I read. I got to page 76 when I began getting really creeped out.
Definitely gave me Zimzalabim vibes.
At last came the point when the Bunnies went and invited Samantha’s old fling from high school to their beloved Smut Salon and that’s when weird things really start going down.
Let’s just say a few bunnie conjuring, heads exploding, cult gathering scenes later I finally digested that this book was indeed a horror book. I even got so creeped out that I bothered five of my friends to play iMessage games with me because of how scared I was.
I would say read this book if you enjoy narratives from a unreliable narrator like in The Yellow Wallpaper and if you just want to get mind-fucked in every way possible. You could not stop reading this book because of how weird it was and how Samantha just kept falling deeper and deeper into this rabbit hole with the other Bunnies…
This whole book was enjoyable to read and just made me have a lot of ???? moments which I don’t doubt other people have had also and because of the ending which still has me like…. REALLY??? THAT’S WHAT HAPPENED???
Bunny by Mona Awad definitely was a trip down a really weird rabbit hole and had me on the edge of my seat and shoulders hunched up because of creepy it was. If you enjoy horror and a very sarcastic and relatable main character who doesn’t like people (like me) then this book is perfect for you.
There’s this quote by Fydor Dostoyevsky (I’ve read a few of his words in my World Lit class) and I just want to talk about it, I feel like talking about it would be good for me.
So, the quote goes:
“‘I exist.’ In thousands of agonies- I exist. I’m tortured on the rack -but I exist! Although I sit alone- I exist! I see the sun, and if I don’t see the sun, I know it’s there. And there’s a whole life in that, knowing the sun is there.'” – Fyodor Dostoyevsky, The Brothers Karamazov
When I read that for class, it made me think about how sometimes people feel alone even in a room full of people. Maybe that’s just a quote from Tumblr, I know I lived, breathed, inhaled fake deep quotes from Tumblr back in 2013, but I often think about how true that people do feel like that. Because sometimes, even now I feel that way too.
Sometimes, when my words get too jumbled up in my head, and no matter how many times I cry, scream, or even attempt to explain what I’m possibly thinking about in my head to my friends or family, I feel like they will never quite understand what I’m trying to say, what kind of sentence or paragraph or even book I’m trying to decipher to them. How, at the end of the day, although I go through all this agony and loneliness, even though I attempt to talk about how I feel, how even though there are glorious amounts of people that care and surround me- why do I still feel alone?
And I hate feeling like that.
I hate feeling like the quiet and the loneliness is taking over when I try again and again to get away, to just breathe and read a page one step at a time, but in the end, my heart starts pumping loudly against my ears before I know it, and my breath gets shaky, and the quiet and the anxiety will never ever let me be free.
I almost seem to never get away from it.
Then, there’s that weird part of my brain that tells me that I’m not alone. And I know it. I have evidence of it. I have pictures of myself smiling and having fun with people that care about me, and I know they care about me. So why does loneliness seem to thaw away at any event that I’m in?
That quote makes me think about you can just open up your window and scream out into the night sky and as your screams echo throughout the city and come back to you, you get this sort of eerie silence. Because you know that there are other people living as well. They’re in front of you, but they never responded.
I have to remind myself that in a thousand agonies, I do exist. And there is life outside with people even if they don’t respond, even if they don’t understand what I’m trying to say. Just as Dostoyevsky said. There is a beauty in knowing that the sun is there. And I do. The sun will always be there, coming up for a new day even when the night and darkness falls upon me for many nights. The sun will rise.
Dostoyevsky said, “In thousands of agonies- I exist.”
And I do. I do exist. I feel real. Even at nights when I don’t.
You exist as well. We are all living in our thousands of agonies, we are all existing.
This is my own version of agonies.
In a thousand words, I exist.
In a thousand words, I’m trying to exist.
In a thousand words, I am alive.
I really like my world lit class, I get introduced to various writers that I haven’t ever read works from. I used to think that I don’t like old Victorian-era writing, but it is marvelous. There is a beauty in marvelous things.
This is a old post from my old blog so I decided why not move my thoughts here :,) I hope everyone is well! Stay safe. Jan.
2020 is soon coming to a end and after a (long) journey of whatever the hell this year was, I figured what better way to wrap up the first few months of my blog with what I’m anticipating to read and watch in 2021!
This year was my year of getting back into books after a year-long hiatus. And after going through (and still going through) this pandemic, I found myself lost and back together with my first love which was reading.
Reading was the perfect escape for myself during those dreadful months of quarantine. And am I broke for ordering too much books during those months? Yes, I am, and what about it?
Not only have I been dwelling in deep with my first love that is books, I’ve also spent waayyy too much time binging TV shows and KDramas on Netflix, Disney+ and Hulu and boy, is my sleeping schedule really forked now 😀
Now that I am back with my roots, I am been exposed to wonderful literature titles and films which have always sparked an interest to me. Now that I have started this blog, I figured what other best way for an audience to get to know me other than knowing what kind of films and books I’m looking forward to in the new year? ٩(ˊᗜˋ*)و
I already have a end of year wrap up video on my channel if you want to check that out here ! (ʃƪ˘⌣˘)
I’m going to get anticipated reads out of the way first and then work my way into films im very excited to watch in the new year!
(P.S. just because it’s a new year, doesn’t mean the pandemic is over). Remember to take precautions, wear a mask and practice social distancing !
Part I. My Most Anticipated Books of 2021
Gearbreakers by Zoe Hana Mikuta
I’ve been hearing so much about this book all the time over Twitter and Instagram and I absolutely cannot wait to get my hands on it! Zoe is such a nice and genuine person on Twitter and I’m excited to read her debut novel. (´͈ ᵕ `͈ )
Gearbreakers comes outJune 29th, 2021. To know information about it, check it out here.
2. The Ones We’re Meant to Find by Joan He
First of all, can we talk about how amazing the cover is? I’m stunned. Truly stunned. I first saw the cover of this book hovering around Twitter for quite some time and the synopsis really captured my attention just by the first line. Can we also talk about Asian rep? We still don’t see a lot of books with an POC main character and here we have two sisters. I truly cannot wait to see what this book has in store for us!
The Ones We’re Meant to Find comes out May 4th, 2021! To find out more about it, check it outhere.
3. The Chosen and the Beautiful by Nghi Vo
A lot of my anticipated reads for the new year are going to be contained of Asian Authors! It’s going to be big year for them and I can’t wait to see what these anticipating reads have for us!
Not only is the cover for The Chosen & The Beautiful absolutely gorgeous and stunning, the story seems appealing as well. We get to see the life of a socialite immigrant in the roaring 20s and her place in this different world of privilege and money. I’m still not finished with Chloe Gong’s These Violent Delights but I am obsessed with the setting of the 1920s. We don’t get to see that much in film or books and now that it’s also in The Chosen & The Beautiful, we finally get to!
The Chosen and Beautiful comes outJune 2021. For more information, check out this link here!
4. Clues to the Universe by Christina Li
The synopsis for Clues to the Universe truly is beautiful and made me so much more intrigued every time I read it. I always will have a deep love for middle grade books no matter what because they’ve always been a comfort place when I was middle school. :,)
Clues to the Universe comes out January 21st, 2020! For more information, click here!
5. Counting Down with You by Tashinie Bhyuiyan
I follow Tashie on twitter and she is absolutely amazing omg. She’s real, hilarious and the memes she tweets about her characters and the other books she’s read is so funny. I haven’t read much fake-dating contemporary books since I was in high school but now I want to pick it back up and be back in my feels. I really do love a good wholesome, high school, slice of life fics and I absolutely cannot wait to read this in the new year (´͈ ᵕ `͈ )♥
And now on to my most anticipated films! If you didn’t know, I spend a lot of time just watching tv shows, kdramas, animes, the whole shabang bc I don’t have a life (ahaha jk… unless…?) *Disclaimer: I am a massive Marvel fan, you’ll most likely find my most anticipated films be related to Marvel. I’ll be doing reviews and theories in the future!*
Part 2: My Most Anticipated Films of 2021
The Chilling Adventures of SabrinaPart 4
I began watching The Chilling Adventures of Sabrina and binged it up this year, catching up with the final season. I’ve always liked shows that have to do with witchcraft and dark magic, and this show greatly satisfied my needs for a badass main character who wanted to balance normal life and her other life as a witch.
I really like this show and I’m sad that it’s coming to an end. It was really entertaining and my favorite characters are Prudence, Ambrose and Sabrina! Season 3 was really good even though it had its Riverdale cringy moments that made me question everything that was writing. I love watching meme videos of shows and youtube and here’s my favorite one of The Chilling Adventures of Sabrina if you like those types of things hehe.
I love Marvel Movies, I love the cinematic universe and how everything is lined with each other. If you don’t know, my favorite superheroes are Spiderman (so excited for new Spider-verse movie!!) and Scarlet Witch! In my opinion Scarlet Witch is the most powerful Avenger out there, (she’s the only one who made Thanos afraid for his life!! She’s crazy!!) Just when I thought I saw everything there was to Wanda and her powers, we finally have WandaVision. She’s powerful enough to create a different reality that’s crazy dude!!
(also can we talk about how there’s going to be a Halloween episode and Vision is wearing his costume from the comics omg).
To this day I still remember the discourse between Iron Man and Captain America and I remember getting into so many twitter fights with my old friend because of them, LOL.
I always wondered what happened after Captain America: Civil War and finally I’m getting the answers I need. I’m sad that Steve Rogers is no longer Captain America after growing up with him for the majority of my childhood, but I also love the relationship between Sam Wilson and Bucky and I can’t wait to see what’s going to happen.
I have so many favorites in the MCU it’s insane. My top three are Spider-man, Scarlet Witch, and Captain America but my favorite anti-hero has got to be either Loki or Deadpool.
Loki has been the funniest character I have ever watched for so long, he’s literally so predictable and yet not at the same time???
Last year when I was watching Endgame with my irl friends one thing that bothered me throughout the entire film was how much they were changing up the timeline. I know Bruce said something about the past can’t change your future or whatever but I still don’t understand what he was on about LOL. When Loki took the tesseract and zoomed out of there I was like… :O NOW WHAT? I NEED ANSWERS!!
After taking my World Literature class this spring semester, I became more involved with writing than I was before and I started to read more poets and writers from the earlier times and can I just say Emily Dickinson… she was that writer.
One of the shows I started watching this year was Dickinson starring Hailey Steinfeld and she is one of my favorite actresses ever I loved her in Pitch Perfect 2 and more. I knew Dickinson was going to be about Emily Dickinson and her journey with being a women writer in the 19th century but I had no idea it was going to be so funny. The whole show is based off of satire of the earlier times and oh my god… it’s hilarious.
Not only is it humorous but it does focus on mental health and the strict gender norms that women were supposed to succumb to back then which was really interesting to watch and I felt so bad for Emily Dickinson since her own brother took her own work and she wasn’t taken seriously.
Everyone please check out Dickinson, it’s one of my favorite shows ever!
welcome to my little corner! ◝(ᵔᵕᵔ)◜ ♡ this page is going to be full of my latest thrift finds, favorite outfits and more. i’m planning on great things for this page, but first, let me introduce you to my style ( *¯ ³¯*)♡
welcome to a collection of me, jan.
here, you’ll get an idea of who i am as a person. what i like according to my thrift finds, taste in music, books, and more.
welcome to a little sprinkle of me.
hi there. my name is jan and i love reading, editing, writing, drinking hokkaido milk tea and spilling my endless thoughts about literature, film, and occasionally music. i hope you enjoy your time here!
in this page you’ll find posts varying my thoughts about latest songs i enjoy, playlists for any type of mood you might feel suit your needs, shows i’ve been binging and the occasional food i would recommend!
i really enjoy a lot of things and my interests vary way outside of books and film, you can find anything here on januisance as long as you know where to look!
i’ve labeled everything on the nuisancepage so you can find everything much easier there! everything books and literature has its’ own category on my blogtab.
thank you so much for stopping by! if you have any questions you can find my contact information on the tab above!